2016 Previews: NFC East

The NFC East was the worst division in football last year. How bad were they? Well, that hilariously imploding Philadelphia team under Chip Kelly was a comfortable second place. Probably an improvement coming this year though, right?

Washington

2015 record: 9-7, and one incredibly successful meme. Kirk Cousins tried to trademark “You like that”, so I do not.

What’s To Love? This is a surprisingly well-balanced roster, but two areas stand out especially: receivers and cornerbacks. At receiver and tight end, Washington have five starting calibre players who complement each other. Deep-threat: DeSean Jackson. Wily veteran: Pierre Garcon. Comfort blanket: Jordan Reed. Shifty slot receiver: Jamison Crowder. Possession receiver: Josh Doctson. These are all good players, if not elite, but they have variety, ability, and are the sort of cast you want if you’re not completely sold on your quarterback as yet. As for cornerback, the acquisition of Josh Norman instantly puts Washington near the top of their rankings. With the ever-improving Bashaud Breeland alongside him, they may turn out to have the back cornerback duo this side of the Rockies.

What’s Not To Love? I do quite enjoy that Washington’s owner seems to have this public image as the devil incarnate, even without the farrago around their nickname. The flipside of having a well-balanced roster with few elite players is that a little general decline can have a big negative effect. There aren’t any players on either side who’ll grab a game by the scruff of the neck and drag the team to victory (Norman may end up being the exception). Jordan Reed, maybe? Position-wise I’m not overly taken by their front seven, outside of Ryan Kerrigan. It’s a small step back from ‘solid’ to ‘mediocre’, but one that can have a big impact on a team’s record.

What’ll 2016 Be Like Then? Realistically, Washington overachieved last year, and their roster looks of pretty similar quality, with arrivals and departures roughly evening each other out. Kirk Cousins has more of a chance this year, but he wasn’t good all season long, so we still don’t know how he’ll pan out. I think something like a 7-9 season wouldn’t be a surprise here.

Philadelphia Eagles

2015 record: 7-9, but it seems bizarre that Philly finished with this good a record. Everything about their season seemed to be a catastrophe, but there you go, 7 wins. Can’t argue. No Chip Kelly now though, so maybe even a worse record this year will seem like a better season.

What’s To Love? I really like that Philly got Dorial Green-Beckham for nothing, even if it shows up Rueben Randle as being a bust free-agency signing before he’s even run a competitive route (I have a Giants-supporting friend who would maintain Randle has never run a competitive route). Philly obviously feel that they’re in building for the future mode, and that Carson Wentz is that future. For now though, the main thing to (brotherly) love is Fletcher Cox, who is one of the league’s premier defenders, and utterly terrifying to boot: fast, athletic, nimble, strong, canny.

What’s Not To Love? Philly feel like an utter mess this year. They gave up huge numbers of picks to get Carson Wentz, which isn’t something a team that needs to rebuild normally does. The trade for Green-Beckham shows how little is thought of receivers like Randle, Josh Huff and Nelson Agholor. They also gave up their backup lineman, a risky move given their two starting tackles are either banned for ten games (Lane Johnson), or aging and at risk of serious decline (Jason Peters). This is doubly worrying when their #1 running back is famously injury-prone. Oh, and I’m still in disbelief about just how much money they’re giving to other quarterbacks, and how many picks they’ve given up in future drafts.

What’ll 2016 Be Like, Then? I feel like 2016 is the start of several very fallow years for the Eagles. There’ll be enough talent and fight here to get to 5-11, but not much further. The Eagles will then have a high draft choice, which because of this year’s trade for Wentz, will be taken by Cleveland, who may well have two top five picks next year.

New York Giants

2015 record: 6-10, which led to the end of legendary coach Tom Coughlin. His offensive coordinator, Ben McAdoo, took his job, while the defensive coordinator kept his job despite engineering a worse defense than the Saints.

What’s To Love? I know Odell Beckham was in the wrong in that tussle with Josh Norman, but I was still rooting for him. What can I say, I’m one of these unsophisticated philistines who prefers offense to defense. Beckham, a deserving superstar, now has the promising looking Sterling Shepard as his #2 receiver, and while he’s a rookie and therefore likely won’t represent a step up from Rueben Randle in the first couple of weeks at least, one suspects he’ll get there sooner rather than later. I’m also looking forward to seeing how the Giants’ spending-spree on defense (Damon Harrison, Olivier Vernon, Janoris Jenkins) helps improve this defense. Again, you’d expect it to just by the law of averages.

What’s Not To Love? Other than still being icked-out by the photos of Jason Pierre-Paul’s firework-mauled hand, you worry about the offensive line. Weston Richburg and Justin Pugh are good players, but the rest were dreadful last year. While Ereck Flowers should improve in line with expectations for second-year players, elsewhere you’d better get used to running backs getting stuffed at the line, and scary photos of Eli Manning looking semi-concussed.

What’ll 2016 Be Like, Then? I fancy the Giants to do well this year and have no idea why, because looking across the team there are plenty of reasons they won’t. Manning was improved last year but had been miffling in 2013 and 2014. There are basically no linebackers here. Spending free agency money on a flashy new defense hasn’t exactly got the best record in the NFL in recent years. Yet, some weird synapse in my brain is saying “go for 8-8”, so I will. With no evidence or faith in my own opinion. Sod it. POST IT.

Dallas Cowboys

2015 record: 4-12, which isn’t really surprising when you lose your best quarterback and wide receiver and replace them with Brandon Weeden and Brice Butler.

What’s To Love? Romo and Bryant coming back, basically. I think Dallas thought their backup QBs were better than they actually were last year, which led to Matt Cassel incredibly throwing a pick-six while getting flagged for intentional grounding. Bryant is a stud receiver, and while Romo is injury-prone, putting him behind the best offensive line in pro football is about the best way to mitigate that. And without wanting to read too much into preseason football, if Romo does go down the early Dak Prescott signs have been positive. Anyway, the O-line, anchored by Tyron Smith at left tackle and Travis Frederick at center especially, should also see overdrafted rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott to a heck of a lot of yards this year, you’d think.

What’s Not Love? Ooh dear, I don’t like this defense. Rolando McClain, Randy Gregory and Demarcus Lawrence all have suspensions for drug violations, Sean Lee will miss games due to injury, you just know it (he may even be injured now). They passed on Jalen Ramsey in the draft when he was the clearest match between best player available and need, leaving them with two good members of the secondary total – Orlando Scandrick and Byron Jones. They’re going to need Romo healthy to sling it because they are going to concede lots of points.

What’ll 2016 Be Like Then? It’s easy to see divisions who as a whole did poorly one year do poorly again – everyone predicted it with the NFC South last year, then Carolina won 15 and everyone else won at least 6, which isn’t too bad. Hence why I’m saying the NFC East should be a bit more respectable as a whole this year. When Dallas put it together their offense is unstoppable. There’s a comparison with Pittsburgh’s balance of offense-defense here, but I think Pittsburgh are a touch more balanced, so I’ll give Dallas one fewer win and say 10-6.

Draft Tipper: NFC and AFC East

So, our tips for the North divisions were out of date within a day! But they’ve been updated and we’re just in time to talk about Philadelphia’s new position, and guess at players who may be drafted across the NFC East and AFC East. What do you all think of this? Why not get in touch with us on Twitter with your thoughts. And if you’re not sure about what any of the positions mean, you’ll find plenty of information on what position does what in our Glossary.

NFC East

Dallas Cowboys

The pick: 4th overall
They need: Wide Receiver, 4-3 Defensive End, 4-3 Linebacker, Cornerback

Who might they go for in the first round? There are only really four players in likely play if Dallas pick at 4 and don’t trade – Joey Bosa and DeForest Buckner would be edge rushers (though I have seen that people have doubts about whether Buckner would work in a 4-3 defense), Myles Jack at linebacker and Jalen Ramsey at cornerback/safety. At least two of those players will still be available at that point.

In the second round? Any receiver that slips to the second round is in play to take up the slot across from Dez Bryant – so, Corey Coleman, Will Fuller and Michael Thomas are the likely choices. Pass rushers like Kevin Dodd or Noah Spence (if he slides) will also be in play. There aren’t really any linebackers in this range, unless Darron Lee slides, but cornerbacks like Xavien Howard, and maybe Eli Apple or Mackensie Alexander could be around. Also start keeping an eye out for running backs here – Derrick Henry might be the pick here.

New York Giants

They pick: 10th overall
They need: Wide Receiver, Offensive Tackle, 4-3 Linebacker, Safety

Who might they go for in the first round? People would see it as a reach, but Laquon Treadwell is the kind of wide receiver they’re looking for. At tackle, if Ronnie Stanley’s still on the board they’d be delighted, but I suspect Jack Conklin is more realistic. There likely aren’t any linebackers and safeties suitable for picking here, so the Giants may go for a best player available approach.

In the second round? This is the sort of range for Michael Thomas, Braxton Miller and Tyler Boyd, depending on what kind of wide receiver they want. At tackle, they may be able to get Germain Ifedi, but Jason Spriggs and Le’Raven Clark are more realistic. Linebackers like Kamalei Correa and Scooby Wright are pickable here, as are most safeties: Vonn Bell, Karl Joseph and Keanu Neal are all in play.

Philadelphia Eagles

They pick: 2nd overall (no second round pick)
They need: Quarterback, Running back, Offensive Guard, 4-3 Linebacker

Who might they go for in the first round? Philadelphia sure love a pick merry-go-round. They gave up their second round pick to the Rams last year to snag Sam Bradford, and yet here we are again, giving up one future first- and one future second-round pick (as well as this year’s third-rounder) to trade with the Browns for another quarterback. Obviously the Rams have the first pick, but you would hope for the Eagles’ sake that they knew before making the trade which of the two quarterbacks Los Angeles will go for, and it wasn’t the one they wanted. My guess would be that, if the Eagles haven’t just blindly traded up not knowing who’ll be left, it means the Rams want the more pro-ready Goff, while the Eagles want a succession plan in place for Carson Wentz (who would ideally sit and learn for a little while first) to eventually take over from either Sam Bradford or Chase Daniel.

Washington

They pick: 21st overall
They need: Center, 3-4 Defensive End, 3-4 Inside Linebacker, Cornerback

Who might they go for in the first round? Ryan Kelly’s the only center in play here. They may go for A’Shawn Robinson, Jarran Reed, or even Robert Nkemdiche at defensive end. Reggie Ragland is probably the only linebacker in play here. At cornerback, Washington can look at Mackensie Alexander, William Jackson and Eli Apple, at least one of whom you’d think will be available.

In the second round? Nick Martin is the second-best center in the draft, and would fit here. At defensive end, Hassan Ridgeway, Jihad Ward and Adolphus Washington are pickable here. I hope they go for Washington because of the name synergy! At linebacker, here’s a chance to take a punt on Jaylon Smith, but otherwise Su’a Cravens, Kamalei Correa and Kyler Fackrell may be considered. At corner, Kendall Fuller may be another ‘take a punt’ candidate, while Artie Burns should also be on the board.

EDIT: Well, since Washington have signed Josh Norman to a five-year contract, I don’t expect them to go for cornerback in the first couple of rounds now – having Norman and Breeland there should allow them to focus on other areas.

AFC East

Buffalo Bills

They pick: 19th overall
They need: Wide receiver, Offensive Guard, 4-3 Defensive End, 4-3 Linebacker

Who might they go for in the first round? It’s possible no wide receivers will have gone by the time the Bills are on the clock, so Donald Trump-endorser Rex Ryan will have his pick of Laquon Treadwell, Corey Coleman, Will Fuller and Josh Doctson. Defensive ends like Shaq Lawson, Emmanuel Ogbah and Noah Spence are in play here. For linebackers, this is about where you’d expect to see Reggie Ragland picked.

In the second round? They’d be delighted if Michael Thomas is still available, but realistically Tyler Boyd, Braxton Miller and maybe even Pharoh Cooper are more realistic. The top guard, Cody Whitehair will be in play, and there are a few defensive ends like Carl Nassib and Jihad Ward around. At linebacker, Jaylon Smith may be tempting, but if they want someone to contribute this year, Su’a Cravens and Kamalei Correa are more realistic.

Miami Dolphins

They pick: 13th overall
They need: Running back, Offensive Guard, 4-3 Defensive End, Cornerback

Who might they go for in the first round? By trading with Philadelphia, they have less chance of landing Ezekiel Elliott now, and there aren’t really any guards realistic with this pick, unless they want to turn Jack Conklin or Taylor Decker into one. Miami may take a flyer on Shaq Lawson in this range, but a cornerback like William Jackson or Eli Apple would work just as well too.

In the second round? If Derrick Henry’s still there, he’d be a great running back, with Devontae Booker as a decent alternative. Cody Whitehair’s the top guard and would be in play, though Germain Ifedi and Jason Spriggs are the sort of tackle a coach might like to turn into a guard. At defensive end, Shilique Calhoun, Noah Spence and Kevin Dodd may be around to pick. At cornerback, Xavien Howard and Artie Burns are in play, as is Kendall Fuller, who may or may not be able to contribute this year.

New England Patriots

They pick: 60th and 61st overall (no 1st round pick)
They need: Running back, Offensive Guard, Center, 4-3 Defensive End

Who might they go for in the second round? At running back, Devontae Booker would be a good scenario, but more likely it’ll be picking one of Kenneth Dixon, CJ Prosise or Paul Perkins. Guards like Cody Whitehair, Joshua Garnett and Spencer Drango will be available, though turning a tackle like Germain Ifedi into a guard will also be a consideration. Nick Martin may be available at center, and at 4-3 end, Shilique Calhoun, Carl Nassib and Charles Tapper may be around. Though good luck to anyone trying to second-guess Bill Bellichick.

New York Jets

They pick: 20th overall
They need: Quarterback, Offensive Tackle, 3-4 Outside Linebacker, 3-4 Inside Linebacker

Who might they go for in the first round? Paxton Lynch is the top quarterback in range at this point, and there’s a good chance he’s already gone, so if the Jets really want a first-round quarterback, it’s time to reach for Connor Cook. At tackle, Jack Conklin and Taylor Decker are projected to go around about here. Shaq Lawson and Noah Spence are big pass rushers who could go here, while Leonard Floyd and Darron Lee are more traditional outside linebackers. At inside linebacker, this is Reggie Ragland country.

In the second round? Connor Cook may even still be on the board, but if the Jets want a project, Cardale Jones, Dak Prescott or Christian Hackenberg may be in play. At tackle, Jason Spriggs and Le’Raven Clark are feasible, and at pass-rusher, Shilique Calhoun and Yannick Ngakoue may be in play. At linebacker, look out for Scooby Wright, Su’a Cravens, and maybe Beniquez Brown.

Wild Card Previews by Roughing the Passer

It’s wild card week in the playoffs, and Roughing the Passer is back from wherever the heck he went, and he’s back previewing action. Where did he go? There are many rumours. Maybe he was on safari in the Serengeti, or lounging on a Cayman Islands beach. Or maybe he was somewhere in Michigan, standing out in the cold, wearing a Honolulu blue jersey with the number 81 on the back, barely audible, chanting “please don’t retire Calvin, please don’t retire Calvin” over and over… Anyway. The games. I was hoping he was going to predict the winners this week, but no. Chickenshit.

Kansas City at Houston – Saturday ‘afternoon’

This match will be a hard one to watch, because it will serve to remind me of the wasted anguish of my own football-watching season (I’m a Lions fan, so that’s every season). The Chiefs will rile me up because I watched them make the Lions look like amateurs at Wembley earlier this year, despite the fact they had a record about as bad as ours at the time, and we had experience of playing (and winning!) in foggy London town. To be fair, the Chiefs have gone on an absolute tear since then, coming to this game with double-digit winning streak (the Lions have been sneaky good too, except when it counts – TOO LITTLE, TOO LATE DUDES), and even safe old Alex Smith looks kind of frisky. It’s ironic that San Francisco ditched Smith in favour of a leg-powered shiny new model (wherefore art thou now, #7tormcoming? (Ed – somewhere quoting Iain Duncan Smith on his twitter bio)), when Smith is now running all over the shop like a gormless, white Cam Newton.

The Texans on the other hand managed to win a division that included the Colts and the Jags, both of whom I’ve agreed to see play at Wembley next season. Why have I done this? When neither were good enough to overcome this medicore Texans team, a team so flawed that they named their starting quarterback for the season, then ditched him after just an hour of play, in favour of a guy that couldn’t reliably find his way to team flights on time, let alone the endzone? Andrew Luck better be healthy by October. I want to see weekly scans of his spleen, or whatever it is he’s messed up.

Pittsburgh at Cincinnati – Saturday ‘evening’

My god, I’m angry at this Steelers team. As if Big Ben weren’t a reprehensible enough human being, he single-handedly destroyed my fantasy season by striding into the final game, against the lowly Ravens of all teams, and racking up all of 3.8 points. What? Ameer Abdullah scored me more than that, and he’s physically incapable of holding onto the ball. I’m not even sure he has fingers. It’s almost impossible for Ben to score so poorly. I have to assume he was paid off (and I put nothing past my fantasy opponent, there are no depths to which he wouldn’t stoop). As such, I hope they get blown up here, but instead they’ll probably throw for 500 yards and half a dozen touchdowns. Scumbags.

I feel kind of sorry for the Bengals, they’re this year’s Arizona Cardinals – a strong showing all season, capped with a devastating injury blow that might just end their championship aspirations. A lot of people think that the ideal karmic display here would be to win this, only for Andy Dalton to return and THEN lose in the next week, but I think that’s too cruel. Instead, just have them lose here, and let that mighty record of playoff failure continue for another year. You don’t mess with perfection like that.

Seattle at Minnesota – Sunday ‘afternoon’

Tanking is a unique phenomenon in American sports, where, because there’s no risk of relegation to a lower league, teams can deliberately perform badly in order to gain the delicious rewards of better draft picks, and a greater chance of reinvigorating your team. I don’t think it’s that prevalent in the NFL, where players want to create good game film and coaches want to preserve their jobs, but you have to think that both the Vikings and the Packers wanted to lose last week. The Seahawks just find ways to win (Superbowl XLIX excepted), and they’re coming in hot right now. Beastmode is gearing up, their receivers have learnt how to get down field, and Russell Wilson has made me want to drink his bubble water (this is not a euphemism). I assume it’s the water that’s making him so good. If it’s just “not having sex with Ciara”, you’d expect that to be true of every other quarterback who is not having sex with Ciara. Unless…

Anyway, I don’t think Bridgewater is ever going to be all that (Ed – fuck off), so make the most of Adrian Peterson while you can, Vikings. Maybe he’ll run you right into the Superbowl, and your sense of shame will force you to perform seppuku in the stands as you watch the scumbag hoist the Lombardi aloft.

Green Bay at Washington – Sunday ‘evening’

YOU LIKE THAT? YOU LIKE THAT?! You might have to! Because Kirk Cousins (a Michigan State Spartan, thus someone I am compelled via family ties to root for) is balling out right now, and even though their division was a hot mess, they won it fair and square. I don’t really know what it is they’re doing to win – just, not losing, I think – but since it’s the playoffs, and anything can happen, I think they might just pull this out of the bag. The oddsmakers have Green Bay favoured here, but I think we’re letting history cloud our judgement. Yes, Aaron Rodgers is freaky good. Yes, Green Bay know how to win. But come on. They’ve been downright ugly for stretches this year. They lost to the Lions at Lambeau! They got LITERALLY torn apart by the Cardinals! It’s not just a Jordy Nelson thing. This team is vulnerable. And now the Washington Racists can slime their way past them and notch up their first playoff win in ages. Which I’m supporting? Christ, but the NFL makes moral relativists of us all.

Oh hey, what happened to RGIII by the way? Is he still a thing? I want to see a reality show with him and Johnny Football next year, maybe just reviewing Texas divebars or something.

2015 Playoffs: Team by Team

Twelve teams have made the playoffs then, and only one can triumph. Who’ll that be? Well, we don’t know, and frankly our predictions are probably going to be way off. BUT let’s predict anyway, because it’s fun and interesting to write and read.

NFC Playoff Teams

#1 Seed – Carolina
Strengths: Multiple. Cam Newton’s an incredible quarterback, possessed with a rocket arm, rushing ability, big-play ability, you name it. Despite having a relatively low accuracy percentage (in part brought about by throwing more deep passes, and having no receivers who can catch), he’s been careful enough with the football, and has accounted for 45 touchdowns this season. The defense are monsters – Kawaan Short is one of the best interior linemen in the league, Luke Kuechly and Thomas Davis are an intelligent, instinctive and brutish linebacker duo, and Josh Norman is a shutdown corner (most of the time)
Weaknesses: There are a few spots lacking in depth around the roster. Who’ll play corner opposite Josh Norman is still up in the air. As good as they are on the defensive interior (linemen and linebackers), the outside pass-rush is only so-so. And their run game may suffer without Jonathan Stewart, who’s injury-prone and injured.
Will they win it? They’re a pretty good shout to. I mean, they’ve only lost once all year, they’re accomplished in all areas of the game. It’ll take a very specific gameplan while manages to isolate their few weaknesses to beat them (but then, doesn’t that always?).

#2 Seed – Arizona
Strengths: Again, multiple. Carson Palmer is enjoying a career-best year having only just turned 36. He has a resurgent Larry Fitzgerald to throw to, as well as two other great starters in Michael Floyd and John Brown, and a bevvy of other good contributors. The run game has been great whichever Johnson has started (Chris and David). Only one team (Carolina) has scored more points this season. Their defense is strong, and Dwight Freeney spins his way to sack after sack after sack. They’re so versatile too – before his injury, Tyrann Mathieu played a cornerback-safety hybrid role that teams just couldn’t deal with. Deone Bucannon is part linebacker, part strong safety.
Weaknesses: There didn’t look like any, but they got absolutely destroyed by Seattle in the last week of the season. Don’t forget they were playing for the number 1 seed, so it’s not like they could afford to take the week off. The offensive line is great in the run game but you worry about it in pass protection. And those injuries are starting to mount up.
Will they win it? I was all ready to say “yes” loudly here before the Seattle game. One game shouldn’t mean a huge amount. It’s just that Arizona’ll have to beat Seattle to get to the Super Bowl in the first place. And if not Seattle, then another team who are strong in similar areas: Carolina.

#3 Seed – Minnesota
Strengths: I love watching this defense so much. They get so much penetration through the middle with Linval Joseph, are terrifying on the outside with Everson Griffen, Danielle Hunter and Brian Robison racking up the sacks. Then they have Eric Kendricks and Anthony Barr waiting in the wings behind the line. Oh, and just the small matter of Harrison Smith, who might be the league’s best safety, sitting behind them. Add in to that the league’s leading rusher, Adrian Peterson, and you see why they made the playoffs.
Weaknesses: Outside of Peterson, the offense does look a bit dicky. The line has done surprisingly well but struggles in pass protection. Teddy Bridgewater hasn’t kicked on this year, and though he doesn’t cost Minnesota games, he’s not going to win many on his own. Of course, without any top receivers, he’s limited in his development, but either way the offense needs the defense to keep them ahead in games.
Will they win it? No, sorry. They play Seattle first up, who are as good on defense but more threatening on offense. The only hope is that their defense will destroy Seattle’s weak offensive line, but it’s not as if Seattle won’t do the same back in return. Minnesota are young and will improve, but they’re too one-dimensional on offense right now.

#4 Seed – Washington
Strengths: The reasoning side of my brain is trying to stop me writing “Kirk Cousins” here, because that doesn’t make sense. But Cousins has been great the second half of the season. But why is that? Well, the offensive line has seriously kicked on. DeSean Jackson came back from injury and having him as a deep threat keeps defences on their toes. Ryan Kerrigan is also playing fantastically, rushing from the edge.
Weaknesses: There’s a lot of just okay players in this team. The secondary in particular is struggling – Will Blackmon (cut by the Seahawks preseason) has appeared too much, and they’ve just signed Cary Williams (cut by the Seahawks midseason) to provide depth. While the rush linebackers are fine, the defensive line also is a bit something and nothing, even with Terrance “Pot Roast” Knighton.
Will they win it? No, but they might win a game (or two) and surprise people. They haven’t beaten a single team with a winning record this year, and have only played two playoff bound teams (Carolina and New England), games they lost by a combined score of 71-26.

#5 Seed – Green Bay
Strengths: The defense, oddly. Mike Daniels has been brutal enough up front to go from “decent starter” to getting a big tasty new contract. Clay Matthews and Julius Peppers are still stars at linebacker, Ha-Ha Clinton-Dix is ever improving at safety, and Sam Shields is a good head cornerback. They also have a guy called Aaron Rodgers at quarterback, who might be the best quarterback in the league (even if he hasn’t always played like it this year).
Weaknesses: The offense has been bizarrely bereft this year. Losing a receiver as good as Jordy Nelson to a preseason injury is going to hurt any team, but we all thought Randall Cobb and Davante Adams would step up. Cobb partly has, Adams definitely hasn’t. These last two years, Eddie Lacy looked to have given Green Bay a solid run game, yet this year he just hasn’t cut it often enough, struggling with weight and injury.
Will they win it? I don’t think so. Aaron Rodgers always gives them a chance, and they’re coached fantastically. But there are some teams against whom good coaching and planning just can’t overcome the performance gap, and that’ll be Green Bay’s downfall.

#6 Seed – Seattle
Strengths: We all know about the defense. About how Michael Bennett and Cliff Avril are terrifying up front, about how Richard Sherman, Earl Thomas and Kam Chancellor are fantastic in the back end. But in addition to all these, check out KJ Wright at linebacker, who’s stout against the run and the pass. Russell Wilson has been fantastic in the second half of the season, as has Doug Baldwin. Marshawn Lynch should be back for the playoffs, but even if he isn’t, and even with Thomas Rawls also out for the season, Christine Michael has finally looked like the runner the world thought he was since entering the lineup these last few weeks.
Weaknesses: Sweet lord, the offensive line. For the first half of the season, it legitimately looked like they were trying to get Russell Wilson killed. Maybe he scammed them into buying some of his Fake Bullshit Water, or something. Also, outside of Doug Baldwin, the receivers are the sort of players who need Russell Wilson to do most of the work in them getting the ball. Jermaine Kearse, Luke Willson and co are okay, but okay’s not that good in the playoffs.
Will they win it? They certainly could. Russell Wilson’s the best quarterback you can have if your offensive line’s bad, and this is a team that can match up well against anyone on its day. If they’re to win it, I think it’ll be because the run defense makes opponents too one-dimensional and easier to defend.

AFC Playoff Teams:

#1 Seed – Denver
Strengths: Denver have the best defense in the NFL and it isn’t even close. At cornerback, Chris Harris and Aqib Talib are both going to the pro bowl, and Bradley Roby’s a good third cornerback. At safety, TJ Ward is probably the most underrated player on this team. At linebacker, Von Miller. Holy shit, Von Miller is terrifyingly good. DeMarcus Ware hasn’t been at his best this season but that’s a terrifying pass rush. And then they have Brandon Marshall (no, not that one) and Danny Trevathan at inside linebacker, which is also pretty terrifying. Wow.
Weaknesses: How can you be a number 1 seed and not know who your starting quarterback is. Peyton Manning has been rebuilt but all the parts aren’t quite performing at maximum efficiency. Brock Osweiler is as so-so as his name is bizarre. At least the running game’s coming good, because although those two receivers (Demaryius Thomas and Emmanuel Sanders) are strengths, they’ve had a few cases of the dropsies lately.
Will they win it? Teams with a middling offense generally need an all-world defense to triumph, and Denver certainly have one of those. They’ve won several low-scoring contests, and have overtime wins against New England and Cincinnati already, plus a more comfortable one over Green Bay. Also, the running game has started to click these last few weeks, which is a tad portentous for other teams.

#2 Seed – New England
Strengths: Tom Brady, who when he’s not squirming about Donald Trump, finds the time to run an efficient offense, broken up with passes to their other strength, Rob Gronkowski. Actually, it’s a bit unfair on the well-run defense to lead with Brady. Chandler Jones and Jamie Collins are the sort of players you don’t notice who win you games just by shutting down options for the opposition. Collins can tackle, cover, do anything really. But there’s quality across the defense: no team would sniff at Rob Ninkovich, Dont’a Hightower, Devin McCourty, Patrick Chung.
Weaknesses: WOW that’s a lot of players on injured reserve. Notably, their best tackle Nate Solder is on injured reserve, right tackle Sebastian Vollmer is in-again-out-again, their backup LaAdrian Waddle, cut by the O-line-poor Lions, isn’t fully fit, nor is starting guard Josh Kline. Oh, and Brady got a high ankle sprain in the week. Their run game’s been poor since Dion Lewis went on season-ending injured reserve too.
Will they win it? While my shamelessly biased side says “I hope not”, they are the Patriots and so they can always win it. A hobbled Tom Brady is still a threat to anyone, Bill Bellichick is still an excellent head coach, albeit one with a Mourinho-sized dark side (or maybe “because he’s” rather than “albeit”, and that defense is going to be tricky for anyone to unpick.

#3 Seed – Cincinnati
Strengths: This is a well-run, deep team with balance across the roster, high calibre head coach and coordinators, and a sweet uniform whenever they turn out in orange. AJ Green and Tyler Eifert are top drawer wide receiver and tight end prototypes. Jeremy Hill and Gio Bernard are the best running back one-two punch around. Geno Atkins is one heck of a destructive defensive lineman. Reggie Nelson, Carlos Dunlap, George Iloka et al are solid starters. Andrew Whitworth is a star tackle finally going to his first Pro Bowl. Andy Dalton’s finally performing at a high level as a quarterback.
Weaknesses: At least he was. Then he got injured. Now last year’s fifth-round pick AJ McCarron has to steer his team through games. He was always going to be at least a game manager, but he has to quickly develop the ability to do more than that (the potential is there). And, for all that this is a well-built roster, outside of Atkins and Green there are no superstars here. That wouldn’t be a problem with early season Dalton quarterbacking, but they might just need to be a tiny bit better to make it.
Will they win it? Doubt it, but stranger things have happened. They’ll need the odd opponent to underperform, and a few of the solid players to have star performances, but the depth is there. Dalton should be back if they win their first game, so a lot will hinge on that.

#4 Seed – Houston
Strengths: JJ Watt and DeAndre Hopkins, basically. Especially Watt, for whom a down year would constitute “not winning Defensive Player of the Year”. He destroys all but the stoutest double-teams, and if he destroys that, he destroys your quarterback to the tune of 17.5 sacks this year. Oh, and he has Whitney Mercilus alongside him, who’s pretty darned good. Hopkins is an elite wide receiver, and no other skill position players on this team come close. He creates separation, he wins contested catches, he’s very reliable.
Weaknesses: Houston won the weakest division in the NFL, and they’re the weakest team in the playoffs. Like Washington, there’s a bucketload of mediocrity here. Without their best offensive linemen (Duane Brown, just this week gone to injured reserve), pass rushers will severely test their perfectly fine but no better quarterback, Brian Hoyer. The cornerbacks are fairly decent, but they’re weak at safety. The running game’s been so-so ever since Arian Foster went on injured reserve, and none of the tight ends are particular threats.
Will they win it? No. There aren’t enough good players, and whereas the roster’s well-coached, that’s not enough. JJ Watt’ll give people scares, Hopkins’ll get a big chunk of yards, but not much else will happen.

#5 Seed – Kansas City
Strengths: The defense is, again, spectacular (noticing a theme with some of these teams?). Star pass rusher Justin Houston’s had a season disrupted by injury and it still hasn’t stopped them. Tamba Hali and Dontari Poe are the stars of the front seven, Eric Berry challenges Harrison Smith for the best safety in the NFL despite being cancer free for less than six months, and cornerback Marcus Peters will probably win Defensive Rookie of the Year. On offense, Jeremy Maclin has finally given them a star at wide receiver.
Weaknesses: The offensive line is only so-so, which is mitigated somewhat by quarterback Alex Smith being a fan of the short pass, but still is a concern. Smith himself isn’t a deep threat, which limits their passing game. In fact, the Chiefs only rank 27th across the league in yards gained on offense, so they’ll have to win attritional battles to progress.
Will they win it? Do you know what, don’t rule it out. My instinct is to say “no way” because they look a bit anaemic on offense, but delve a bit deeper and you see a solid run game and clock control. Andy Reid and Bob Sutton are a great head coach and defensive coordinator and they’re getting the most from this team. Every team will find them tough to beat, and they’ve just won ten on the trot to get here.

#6 Seed – Pittsburgh
Strengths: Offense. Hoooo boy do they love slinging the ball long. When your three wide receivers are the excellent Antonio Brown, the very good Martavis Bryant, and the also good Markus Wheaton, things look good for you. One interesting stat: they’re 8-for-9 this season on fourth down conversions. 89%. The next best is 67%. What does that mean? Uh…not sure, but this team has been putting on offensive splashes every week, so it’s fun to watch at least.
Weaknesses: That defense looks like it could crack at any minute. The secondary is one brainfart away from giving up a touchdown on any pass, it seems. The pass-rush has been so-so. In fact, the defense ranks 21st in yards per game. The real worry though? They’ve run the best fantastically all season, whether with Le’Veon Bell or DeAngelo Williams. But Bell was lost earlier in the season, and Williams is currently a bit knacked. Third choice Fitzgerald Toussaint came in for the last game of the season and was bobbins. If the run game dies, I think Pittsburgh look distinctly beatable.
Will they win it? I just don’t think the defense is good enough. A well-balanced team with a good pass rush and secondary will limit the Steelers on offense, and if that team also has a good passing attack (as several of those teams do), it’s going to be distinctly peaky for Pittsburgh.

A Look at the 2016 NFL London Games

For the third year in a row, the NFL are scheduling three games in London for our delectation. There are a couple of wrinkles in the announcement this year: one of the games will be played at Twickenham, and one of the games doesn’t have an opponent announced as yet! The teams hosting games are the Jacksonville Jaguars (as ever), the St Louis Rams, and the Cincinnati Bengals.

Game 1 – Indianapolis Colts at Jacksonville Jaguars

For the second year in a row, we have a divisional matchup at Wembley, as the underwhelming Jets-Dolphins games doesn’t seem to have put anyone off. More relevantly, it’s the fourth year in a row (of the planned five so far), we’ve got the Jaguars hosting a game. Remember when that ‘agreement’ that the Jags were going to be here til doomsday was made, and an entire British-based NFL fanbase groaned? Yeah, it was justified then, but such is the NFL that suddenly we as fans think we might be watching a future powerhouse, or at least a contender. The 2013 and 2014 hapless Jags are gone (remember how bad that game against the 49ers was), and the 2015 maybe-competitive Jags are here.

I want to write about Jacksonville a bit more, as they’re close to being the most interesting team in the NFL, given how they’re rebuilding and how it seems to be going. This isn’t the place for an essay, but a summary will tell us why to be excited about watching them more. Bortles at quarterback: he looks talented, and at the very least you’d hope for him to develop into Matt Stafford, but the very tip of his potential is probably much more Brett Favre. He’s also going to set the record for touchdown passes in a Jaguars season this year. Allens Robinson and Hurns at wide receiver: Robinson might be one of the best possession receivers in the NFL, and Hurns is definitely one of the best secondary options, and with TJ Yeldon and Julius Thomas getting more in sync with the gameplan, the offense is going to be exciting. Defense isn’t so much yet, even though Telvin Smith looks a talent at linebacker. But, third-overall-this-year-pick Dante Fowler Jr will be playing next year, after missing all this year.

And all this, to play the Colts. The Colts are fascinating in a different way. Andrew Luck has been bad this year as he battles injuries, but he’s still someone you just have to watch. However, outside him, general manager Ryan Grigson has done one of the poorest roster-construction jobs you’ll see anywhere, with weaknesses filled with underperforming free agents or veterans in decline. The offensive line has been swiss cheese (hence why Luck keeps getting crushed), the defense is mediocre and unmemorable (Vontae Davis was one of the best cornerbacks in the league last year! This year, not so much), and for all the skill players on the roster, people like Frank Gore, Andre Johnson, Donte Moncrief, Coby Fleener, Dwayne Allen, have just not performed. Even TY Hilton’s underwhelmed.

I think this game will be interesting because the Jaguars will be closer to the Colts than ever. Jacksonville will be full of young talent, and it’s just a question of how the mental errors players commit early in the career balance out. The Jags defense will probably still be weak enough that Andrew Luck can do a fair bit, but the offense will give Indianapolis fits. It could even be a shootout! That said, I think a lot of Indianapolis’ roster for next year is a bit unknown – not just how will Andrew Luck play, but how many veterans will be gone, who will get brought in. Expect a lot of money spent in free agency and a little bit of a roster overhaul, which makes it yet more interesting.

Game 2 – Unknown NFC East at St Louis Rams

This is the game at Twickenham, and could well be the stinker of the bunch. The Rams are the worst team, bar none, to watch in the NFL this year. Even having the most exciting offensive rookie in the league can’t make you switch on this snoozefest. Not even having the toughest defense with probably the second best defensive player in the league can make you bother. In fact, if you’re new to NFL, that’s probably more likely to make you turn off!

And we don’t know who they’re likely to be playing! Well, we know it’s whoever comes third in the NFC East. We can probably safely say that isn’t the New York Giants – though they’re only 5-5 they’re the best team in the East and if they don’t win it, they should come second. So, it’s going to be one of Dallas, Philadpelphia and Washington. And really, it could be any of those three. Everyone will be hoping it isn’t Washington, who are playing here in Game 3, and are possibly the most (rightly) reviled teams in the NFL. They’re also toilet to watch. Dallas? It might be them, and it’s always fun to watch Romo, Bryant, that offensive line. Philly are the great unknown though, and may well make this the most interesting game. Who’ll be coaching them? It looks like Chip Kelly’s on his way back to harangue unpaid players in college. Who’ll be quarterbacking? Suddenly Sam Bradford doesn’t look like a long-term option. Who anything?

So yeah, if Twickenham’s easier to get to than Wembley for you, consider this game! If not, maybe just get a season ticket and try and hawk your one for this to ‘friends’. I wouldn’t be amazed if this game falls short of selling out, or at least has a fair few empty seats despite nominally doing so.

Game 3 – Washington at Cincinnati Bengals

It’s a pleasant surprise to have as high performing a team as the Bengals coming to Wembley. Perennial playoff participants (with a hat-tip to the Colts), they’ll be the most talented home roster we’ve had. Going up against Washington though, bleurgh. The most entertainment you get from following Washington is by googling “Dan Snyder” followed by an insult. For those who don’t know, Dan Snyder’s the team owner, and…not the least controversial figure in sports, put it that way. Go on, have a google.

There’s a lot to enjoy in Cincinnati’s roster. Beyond Andy Dalton’s maturation at quarterback this year, there’s plenty of fun at the skill positions. Gio Bernard is one of the slippiest running backs around, and alongside Jeremy Hill’s more physical style is a nice complement. AJ Green is one of the top ten receivers in football, Tyler Eifert one of the top five receiving tight ends, and other pieces like Marvin Jones and Mohamed Sanu can do as much crazy stuff as anyone (see Sanu’s touchdown pass to Andy Dalton for evidence). They’re tough on defense, good on the offensive line. They’re a real all-round team. And they’re the home team, so a good chance of those gorgeous orange-with-bengal-tiger-sleeve uniforms.

There’s not much to enjoy in Washington, outside of DeSean Jackson being one heck of a deep threat. The quarterback is mediocre and may not be there next year, there are a bevvy of underwhelming running backs, cornerbacks, offensive linemen, heck, everything. I don’t enjoy watching Washington at all and I can’t see them turning into a neutral’s favourite any time soon.

All that said though, I think this might be a good game. Washington do have a habit of punching above their weight, and Cincinnati do make things a tad closer than they need to be this year. I don’t see either team being especially better or worse next year than this. If, as is not impossible, the Bengals go and win the Super Bowl (and while they’re outsiders right now, they’re not improbable outsiders), this game becomes a must-see.

What Should I Watch?

First up, if you’re interested and you’ve not been to a game before, go see one. Go see the Jacksonville-Indianapolis or Washington-Cincinnati game. It’s not the American experience, but it’s a damn sight cheaper and a great introduction. A half-decent game can make three-and-a-bit-hours seem like one-and-a-bit if you’re in the stadium. Of course, goes without saying the food and beer are overpriced and poor quality, but that’s watching any medium-or-large-scale sporting event in Britain.

If you want to go to one game, I’d lean towards Jaguars-Colts. It’s got the potential to be the tightest game, it’s got the potential to be the highest quality football, specifically the offensive football. If you’re watching mainly for the defensive side, well you’re probably big enough of a fan of NFL that you want to go to all three anyway. This might turn out to be the game for you, but I doubt it. If you don’t fancy Jags-Colts, Washington-Cincinnati’s your next bet, which may well be a decent game, but probably not an amazing spectacle.

Do you want to go to all three games? Well, that’ll depend on a lot of things. I’d put money on the Twickenham game involving the Rams being utterly pants. The Rams are one of those teams that can make close games seem incredibly dull. But this year past there wasn’t much difference between getting a season ticket (all 3 games), and individual tickets for 2 games. So you may as well buy the ticket then see if you fancy it. Maybe someone living nearby may buy it off you. Maybe you live nearer Twickenham than Wembley anyway. And there’s the fact that we don’t know who’s playing yet – the Eagles have yet to play in Britain, and the Giants and Cowboys have big fanbases. If it’s Washington though, yeesh.

Does this mean a London te- NO. Stop asking that question. I am not answering it.

2015 So Far: NFC and AFC East after Week 3

The third set of divisions we’re going to look at in the “2015 So Far…” series are the NFC and AFC East.

So, the NFC East doesn’t look at that impressive so far this year. The only team with a winning record is the Cowboys (2-1), and they lost their last game having lost quarterback Tony Romo until Week 11 at the earliest, and losing elite wide receiver Dez Bryant possibly for even longer. That said, the offensive line is still fantastic, and Joseph Randle is making a good fist of it. The defense continues to be mostly acceptable, and will improve after Week 4, when Rolando McClain and *shudder* Greg Hardy come back from injury. The Giants (1-2) lead the rest of the pack, and still look as flaky as they ever have for the last few years. Odell Beckham Jr remains incredible, but he’s the only real receiving threat they have, unless you count Shane Vereen catching dump-off passes four yards behind the line of scrimmage. The defense is mostly abysmal, but still they were in strong positions to win the two games they’ve lost, so a winning record isn’t an impossibility. Next up, Washington (1-2), are still the worst team in this division, and don’t look like they’ll win many games. They’ve actually sometimes looked fine this year, and the O-Line coped fairly well against the Rams in their Week 2 win, particularly in the running game, with Matt Jones getting a cool 123 yards and 2 touchdowns. Unfortunately, the execrable Kirk Cousins remains the quarterback, and there’s a lack of ability across this team. The same can’t be said for the Eagles (1-2), who have confounded everyone including, apparently, themselves with their slow start. Sam Bradford has been Bad-ford (sorry), DeMarco Murray has been DeMarco Slurry (I really am sorry) and Chip Kelly has been Chip Smelly. Sorry, don’t know what came over me there. The Eagles seem to be taking a while to get used to personnel changes with newcomers slowly adapting to Chip Kelly’s scheme. The O-Line’s getting there, and Ryan Matthews enjoyed them in their first win, in Week 3. Just…let’s not talk about Murray’s current YPC and season projections…

Over in the AFC East, it’s the glory hunter’s favourites, the Patriots (3-0) who head up the division. They look imperiously good, Tom Brady’s only not in the best form of his career because he’s been in unbelievably blistering form at various points of said career. Rob Gronkowski remains both the best receiving and blocking tight end in the league, the offensive line has stepped up, Jamie Collins and Dont’a Hightower are ridiculously good linebackers. Ah, but Tom Brady said “it would be great” if Donald Trump was the next president. Don’t care if he was joking, have decided he wasn’t, he can do one. The Jets (2-1) have been a pleasant surprise offensively, and their defense has been as good as advertised. As bad as he was in Week 3 (and seriously, did you see that lateral?) Brandon Marshall looks like a great signing for a team otherwise lacking in playmakers. We’ve had two games of good Ryan Fitzpatrick at quarterback, and one of bad, and that’s why the Jets are 2-1. An 8-8 season should be achievable. Also hanging around there are the Bills (2-1), who as predicted look like a slightly deluxe version of the Jets. The difference is, where we thought the Bills would be better at WR and worse at QB, it’s actually the reverse. Both the Colts and the Dolphins made it easy for Tyrod Taylor, but he’s talented enough to punish poor defending and looks super-promising. The Bills will be hoping it lasts, because at WR, Sammy Watkins, Percy Harvin and Robert Woods all flash the ability, but lack consistency. As long as one flashes each game, they should have enough to piggyback off this strong defense. Oh god, the Dolphins (1-2) look appalling though. The poor offensive line play is making Tannehill look nervous, and his throws are skittish. The much-vaunted receiver corps? Well, Jarvis Landry looks good, but Kenny Stills has been a non-factor, Greg Jennings possibly moreso. The best receiver at the moment is Rishard Matthews, hitherto the WR4. Expect to improve gradually as first-round pick DeVante Parker is edged into action, mind. Oh, and Ndamukong Suh? He was very good in Week 3, but he’s not a one-man defensive line. When opposing lines are putting three players on him, and despite the space freed up for other defenders they can’t get to the quarterback? Well, it’s people like Olivier Vernon and Cameron Wake (not to mention the linebackers) who are the disappointments.

2015 Previews: Predictions!

You’ve skimmed through all my previews, but you just want the headlines! Who’s going to win the Super Bowl? Who’s going to be the worst team? Who’s going to win X award? Let me try and cover everything.

Super Bowl winner: Green Bay Packers. I still think the loss of Jordy Nelson isn’t enough to stop them winning. Davante Adams will step up to replace Nelson, the defense will be good enough, Aaron Rodgers will be other-worldly at quarterback, and the Packers will be all but unbeatable.

Super Bowl loser: Indianapolis Colts. Yeah, this is a year for no defense, but I like Indy’s no defense over New England’s. Andrew Luck’s getting better every year, and this year he has roughly 86 good receivers to throw the ball to. They just don’t have quite as much depth and aren’t as well-balanced across all positions as Green Bay.

Worst Team: Washington. There are plenty of candidates for this, but Washington have so little across the roster. They’re starting a backup QB, their one good wide receiver is most generously described as “flaky”, their entire defense is terrible, and their run game is barely better. They are dysfunctional to the point of taking the piss. They’ll still win 2, maybe 3 games, but no-one will have a worse record.

MVP: Andrew Luck. This award tends to go to a quarterback, because quite simply they have the most impact on their team. If JJ Watt didn’t win it last year, presumably no defensive player ever will again. So. This year it’ll be the quarterback who puts up the best stats, and given Luck has Andre Johnson, TY Hilton, Philip Dorsett, Donte Moncrief, Dwayne Allen, Coby Fleener, and Frank Gore to throw passes to, he’s going to complete a lot of passes. Also the Colts defense is only ok, so he’ll have to throw a fair bit.

Offensive Player Of The Year: Jamaal Charles. I don’t have a lot of faith in this choice, but it’s a stupid award that shouldn’t exist. Offensive players have won the MVP award every year since 1987. Seven out of the last eleven award winners have also won the MVP. Last year the rushing leader won the award, this year Charles could end up leading the NFL in yards from scrimmage, if Andy Reid ever calls a play for him to get the ball. He’s a surprisingly tough runner, but he’s also a nifty pass-catcher. If it’s a non-MVP-winning QB, it’ll probably be Aaron Rodgers.

Defensive Player Of The Year: Justin Houston. I realise this is two Chiefs picks in a row, and the Chiefs bore me, but as I said, I don’t care enough to give much thought to the OPOTY one above. JJ Watt can’t win this award every year, so maybe he’ll wind up winning it every other year. This means it’s someone else’s go, and why not choose someone who’s pretty much the best pass-rushing linebacker in the NFL? And just got paid like they are! Khalil Mack might be a good outside bet, for what it’s worth. There’s some decent pass rush in the AFC West, for all that I rag on it.

Offensive Rookie Of The Year: Marcus Mariota. Looking at this award’s history, quarterbacks don’t have to be incredible to win the award, and being a dual-threat quarterback certainly helps. Vince Young, Cam Newton and Robert Griffin III all were. I think Mariota’ll be good this year, but more importantly I *want* Mariota to be good this year. He’s a pretty good passer, and being a mobile rushing threat can at least make up a little bit for a poor offensive line, like the Titans have. If not Mariota, Amari Cooper or Ameer Abdullah (particularly if Joique Bell gets injured at all) are decent shouts.

Defensive Rookie Of The Year: Shane Ray. He’s going to have it made perhaps a touch easier for him than other rookies, pass-rushing across from the brilliant Von Miller. Teams will focus more on stopping Miller than stopping Ray, because doing otherwise is a great way to let your quarterback get injured. What all that means is Ray will have more opportunity to get to the quarterback, and perhaps a slightly easier time of it. He’s been excellent in preseason, which while it’s just preseason, is a good way to start. He slid in the draft because of ‘character concerns’ rather than ability. This seems fairly well set up for him to succeed. If not Shane Ray, Vic Beasley would be a good bet.

Coach of the Year: Mike Zimmer. This award is basically a “which team will improve most” award, and I fancy the Vikings to make the playoffs and maybe even win a game or so there. That’ll go a long way to guaranteeing Mike Zimmer this award, and he’s done well to build an improving, young squad that got better through last year and look even better this year. Dan Quinn at Atlanta might be a nice outside bet for this award too.

Comeback Player Of The Year: Sam Bradford. All it needs is for him to not get injured and Chip Kelly’s system should see him home straight. Bradford was improving in a horribly quarterback-unfriendly system in St Louis prior to his two horrible injuries. So it’s not a small ‘all it needs’, but nonetheless. I think I’d most like Eric Berry to win this award though. That’d be a lovely story. And he’s a good enough player that if he gets back to his best this year, he’d be doubly deserving.

2015 Previews: NFC East

The NFC East seems one of the more dramatic divisions! There’s always fun, chaos, dysfunction all that here.

Philadelphia Eagles

Last Year: 9-7

Which Way Are They Going: Up. Why not. Up.

What’s Good: The offensive line. So often it seems like a good offensive line can really make a team (unless you’re the Cleveland Browns). Which makes sense – it gives your quarterback more time to make the right pass, for your receivers to have more time to get separation while quarterback stands around gawping, or it gives the opportunity for your running backs to find more holes, to get more yards. Stands to reason. Philadelphia have one of the best, though they dumped Evan Mathis so it might not be quite what it was. Still, Jason Kelce and Lane Johnson are here too.

What’s Possibly Good But Might Not Be: Sam Bradford. Now here’s the kind of quarterback you need a good offensive line for – one made of finest porcelain. Chip Kelly’s gone a bit injury analytics in signing Bradford (and many other players), and if it goes wrong, it’s going to wrong in style. Mark Sanchez taking over style. I’m rooting for Sam Bradford though, he’s never had a particularly good team to be on until now, and he was improving gradually year-on-year at the Rams, so there’s definitely opportunity for things to go really right for him and the Eagles. An equal number for them to go really wrong, though.

What’s Definitely Not Good: The depth at wide receiver. Jordan Matthews was pretty good last year and will be better this year. Nelson Agholor, their first round pick, will be pretty good this year. Beyond that, not much. Miles Austin is another injury-prone player being given a chance, but him at his best now isn’t that good. Riley Cooper is hopeless, even ignoring his performance at Kenny Chesney concerts. The Eagles coaching staff think Josh Huff is going to be the standout team performer, which is worrying considering how unremarkable he looked last year. So much for Sam Bradford having it easy for him. This is the team that have shipped out legitimately good WRs Jeremy Maclin and DeSean Jackson these last two years.

Anything Else: College coaches like Chip Kelly do tend to seem a bit off in the NFL. It’s like, relatively often, college coaches won’t try to relate to their players, just adopt more of a ‘barking orders’ kind of approach. This is fine when you’re dealing with a group of shocking underrecompensed very young men, relying on you for their break in life. When it’s a group of slightly older multi-millionaires who don’t have to take your crap if they don’t want to, then one must adjust to survive. We’ll see if Kelly does in the long term. Anyway, the Eagles have a bunch of likeable players in people like Jason Kelce, Connor Barwin, Mychal Kendricks. There might be a bit much hope in this but I’m saying 11-5.

Dallas Cowboys

Last Year: 12-4

Which Way Are They Going: Dooown.

What’s Good: Tony Romo to Dez Bryant. Hoo boy, what a connection that is. Romo’s a pretty darn good quarterback and Dez Bryant is an excellent receiver, so expect yet another year of many receptions for Dez. He could lead the league in just about any statistical category this year because, yet again, Dallas have a good enough offensive line that the Cowboys’ll have time for Dez Bryant to get open, and for Tony Romo to heave the ball. And if he can’t? Never fear, there’s Jason Witten at tight end.

What’s Possibly Good But Might Not Be: The running game. And here’s where the limitations of that amazing offensive line come in. Last year, DeMarco Murray led the league in rushing, and the Cowboys were laughing. This year, he’s at the Eagles. So the Cowboys have decided to use hitherto-barely-tested backup Joseph Randle, who when he wasn’t shoplifting underwear and perfume, was helping himself to 6.7 yards per carry. Very good! But on 51 carries, and often when Murray had softened up the defense. Literally no-one knows how he’s going to handle a full-time role. Or even if he’ll have one. Speaking of injury prone players in the NFC East, at the moment the backup is Darren McFadden. Ah.

What’s Definitely Not Good: The defense. Somehow, the Cowboys did okay on defense last year, being mid-table on points conceded per game. They weren’t as good on yards per game though. This year they have more pass-rush (gun-bed-decorating terror Greg Hardy and explicable draft-slider Randy Gregory have been added), but the only able member of their secondary was Orlando Scandrick, and he just tore his ACL and will be out for the season! Uh-oh!

Anything Else: The Cowboys are one of those teams you either love or hate. In the same way that my home country of Yorkshire calling itself “God’s Own County” is hideously obnoxious self-aggrandising bullshit, so are the Dallas Cowboys calling themselves “America’s Team”. They will regress to 8-8.

New York Giants

Last Year: 6-10. I’m kind of surprised they had a worse record last year than 2013, as they seemed a fair amount better.

Which Way Are They Going: Up a little.

What’s Good: I don’t think anyone needs to ask this for the Giants right now. What’s good is Odell Beckham Jr. That ridiculous catch he made against the Cowboys went viral even among people I know who couldn’t care less about the NFL. He is fast, athletic, hard-working, has the most ridiculous hands. He probably won’t be as good this year as last year, as last year was amazing and I guess the way of things is it’s easy to get a little complacent and have to kick yourself back into gear. He will. If he’s not the best receiver in the NFL, he’s going to be, and he’s going to be for a while. Wait, what? He was on the cover of the new Madden game? And everyone who features on the cover is subject to a “curse” and never reaches their previously scaled heights? Oh.

What’s Possibly Good But Might Not Be: Eli Manning. Two years ago, Eli Manning threw so many interceptions it was amazing he wasn’t benched. Last year, he was much better. Yet the Giants finished worse overall. Manning has two Super Bowls without ever seeming as good at quarterback, on a day-to-day basis, not just as the very best (Brees, Rodgers, etc), but as the next tier down (Rivers, Ryan, etc), even when he matches them statistically. It’s probably that gormless expression, isn’t it? Or his AMAZING interception face.

What’s Definitely Not Good: Jason-Pierre Paul’s (missing) finger. Actually, just generally the Giants seem to have a glut of the kind of players that make Darren Anderton look like he’s made of steel. As well as Pierre-Paul (their best pass-rusher), they’ve lost Will Beatty (their starting left tackle), at the last count five of the safeties on their roster. And the players who aren’t out for long periods? Well, they include the very injury prone starting linebacker Jon Beason, and equally injury prone starting slot receiver Victor Cruz. They seem to have more injuries at any time than any other team. It’s baffling.

Anything Else: I’m going to see the Giants in America this year. First time watching an NFL game over there (I watched some NBA years ago), and I’m quite looking forward to it. But. A cheap ticket cost more than the season ticket for the Wembley games this year. That’s right, it’s more expensive to watch one game in New York than three in London. London being a pricier city than New York, that’s an eye-opener. Oh, and the Giants will go 8-8 too.

Washington

Last Year: 4-12.

Which Way Are They Going: Down. Doowwwnnnnnnn.

What’s Good: DeSean Jackson’s pretty good when healthy and motivated. Chris Culliver might turn out to be a good free agent signing. That’s it. Oh, and Ryan Kerrigan’s a good left tackle. But there you go. One man does not an offensive line make.

What’s Possibly Good But Might Not Be: Actually, I should have probably included things I put in the “What’s Good” section in here. That would be more accurate.

What’s Definitely Not Good: This team. All of it. Robert Griffin III has completed his Vince Young career arc, and Kirk Cousins, who is fairly dreadful, is now the started. Backup Colt McCoy is even worse, and at one poine last season Cousins got dropped for him!At receiver, outside of Jackson no-one is good, especially not Pierre Garcon. Alfred Morris is a mediocre running back. Two of their three best tight ends are out for the year, the other is incredibly injury prone. Their first round pick looked like a cardboard cutout in preseason games. The rest of their offensive line is junk. They lost their best defensive player in free agency to the Titans.

Anything Else: Everything you hear from America paints their owner as one of the worst human beings imaginable. It’s quite something, you follow football in Britain and people mumble about owners, and you look at Italy where they love sacking managers. The impression you get from some NFL owners is they take capitalist libertarianism beyond its logical conclusion, to the point where the world only exists to help them make money and serve them, and they are the only ones deserving of the libertarian ideal. That’s how Dan Snyder’s presented. Maybe it’s true. That said, given the implications of how Roman Abramovic made his money, or what Thaksin Shinawatra actually did in Thailand, and you can say “hey, even uber-capitalism isn’t that bad”. Oh, by the way, the Redskins are the worst team in the NFL and will win 1 or 2 games.